For my –th birthday (sensored due to extreme vintage-ness), I asked for and received The Phantom Menace on VHS (yes, you read that correctly, VHS was still a thing then) for two reasons: I liked Star Wars and I wanted to impress a cute boy who loved Star Wars. (Come to think of it, that’s how I got into The Lord of the Rings, too. Different boy though.)

Anyway, now I’m a big girl and I have TPM on DVD (so there’s no more of that obnoxious rewinding business). You’re probably familiar with the plot: Young, awesomely overdressed Queen escapes enemy occupied planet with two sexy Jedi, they land on desert planet and pick up whiny slave boy with super pod-racing powers and magical immaculate birth, big pod race with totally believable outcome (sarcasm), spiky Sith Lord (who’s probably cooler than all the heroes combined) drops in and battle ensues.  Overall, it is an over-produced mess, the actors look uncomfortable delivering super cheesy dialogue and it makes you desperately long for the original series.

Some awesome things that TPM has given us:

-Samuel L. as Mace Windu

-Queen Amidala’s wardrobe (my go-to Halloween costume)

-Darth Maul’s wicked two-sided light saber

-Keira Knightley before Pirates (look closely)

-R2D2’s return

-The hotness that is young Obi-wan Kenobi

Some not-so-awesome things:

-Gungans in general (and JarJar Binks in particular)

-Midi-chlorians (what’s up with that?!)

-C-3PO’s change from lovable fusspot to obnoxious deliverer of corny-ness

-Darth Vader should never say “Yippee!” (NEVER!)

When I saw NFU Oh #60, I immediately thought of Darth Maul. With his awesome black and red skin, he was a perfect match for this polish. A black base with shimmery flakes that change colors from red to green (and everything in between), it’s like watching a lightsaber duel between good and evil right on your finger tips.

This picture is 3 coats with a top coat. Goes on pretty well (the flakes can clump a bit). Removal is a kind of a hassle (definitely use acetone) and my nails suffered from some yellowing afterwards, but it was totally worth it. Bonus points for the NFU Oh bottle. It’s a freakin’ dress! ~K